Tuesday, November 2, 2010

REAL GAMES - AEROBIZ

Finally, it's over! This game takes FOREVER. And what do I get to show for my effort? A fucking sequel that I have to play next.

Aerobiz is a simulation game based on managing an airline. That may be the most boring idea I have ever heard for a game. And it is. This game requires an IV drip of caffeine just to finish it. Do you remember that old tv show, Wings? And the only reason you watched that show was for Lowell. This game is like watching Wings, without Lowell. In fact, it's like watching all 8 seasons of Wings without Lowell, because this game drags on for what seems like 8 fucking years. You will be at a point of complete domination, and this game will still require you to have a certain amount of passengers per quarter before it's over. Even if all of your competitors are bankrupt and you are literally playing the game against yourself, the game will continue. The rest of this review is going to be short and to the point because I have to get started on the god damn sequel.

Where is Lowell?  Why has he forsaken me?
Aerobiz starts off with a selection of time eras to choose from. It doesn't matter. Pick a city to start out as. This doesn't matter either. Start branching out your business. I guess this matters, but I really don't care.

Controls. You pick options with the D-Pad and push a single button throughout the game. Fuck the other 7 buttons.

Audio. Good music. No sound effects. Game lasts so long that even the wide assortment of background music becomes repetitive.

Visuals. Pure shit. You're either looking at a bland map, or an ugly globe. Every time you make a new route, you get treated to watching a horrible plane animation fly over poorly textures backgrounds.

Gameplay. Do you like simulation games? Do you like games about managing businesses? Do you hate having fun? If so, this game was meant for you! For everyone else, this game has very little to offer. Even if you like simulation type games, you will probably hate Aerobiz. I have played good sim games before, and this shit isn't even close.

This is a completely accurate portrayal of this game.
Overall, 0 out of 5. I would have gave it a 1 for the music if this game didn't just piss me off. But it does. So I didn't. If you're a fan of retro video game music, you might want to check out some of the rips. But don't play this game, the music isn't worth it.

Even the fucking ending goes on for way too long.  Seriously, there's about 15 minutes worth of stupid airplane clips and random dialog in this ending.  JUST FUCKING END.  FUCK.

27 comments:

snoobyy said... [Reply]

doesn't look good at all, haha.

Guy Movie Blogger said... [Reply]

LOL sounds like they just said fuck it and released whatever they could whip up in 10 mins.

CAE.II said... [Reply]

Lol this really does sound bad... But I think I may be too curious now to pass it up!

Gansita said... [Reply]

Like The Sims, lol

Anonfourtwenty said... [Reply]

Definitely not going to play that

Telia Tuli said... [Reply]

They always suck you in for another purchase!
Damn them.

Nostalgist said... [Reply]

YOURMOM inc. ... that made me smile^^ also the hilarious business guy. this game made you rage^^

Copyboy said... [Reply]

I'd give it a whirl just to feel like a Hackett brother for a brief shining moment.

Paul said... [Reply]

I hated the hell out of this game till i learned how thing worked then it got kinda better

Donkote said... [Reply]

hahaha i will not be playing this game..

Kikimora said... [Reply]

I won't play this, don't like it :P
Following ^^

Erroneous Maximus said... [Reply]

Hahaha "do you hate having fun". This was an awesome review to read, and I can't wait for more.

Tyrome Grim said... [Reply]

This game sounds awful.. But you are doing it for a good cause, completing a quest .

Mr. Bloggity said... [Reply]

lol, awesome review! Makes me kinda want to play it just to feel how insanely boring it is!

The Angry Vegetarian said... [Reply]

Hahaha, man just your introduction into this game was enough for me to hate it. The concept sounds TERRIBLE. Ok so I typed that just after reading the first paragraph. I just finished. I obviously have never played this game, but I feel the crappiness of it clinging to my skin. 0/5? EPIC!

amidoinitrite? said... [Reply]

thanks for sharing this

comradejoker.blogspot.com/ said... [Reply]

this is legit!

MacPCharmony said... [Reply]

good stuff!

Astra said... [Reply]

0 of 5? guess i will skip this game. Thankyou for the review!

Fuuuuuuuu said... [Reply]

nice!

About Insurance said... [Reply]

good job with this post :)

Swift Love said... [Reply]

this is great!

SpringyB said... [Reply]

Sounds boring as hell. lol @ YOURMOM inc.

JVS said... [Reply]

never heard of it

looks like i did not miss anything

Insurance Advice Guy said... [Reply]

i like this blog ^^

ModerneFusion said... [Reply]

LOL! yourmom incorporated. I'd definitely ride that airline ;)

Koniworld said... [Reply]

iasudhdasu niceee

Post a Comment

Twitter Delicious Facebook Digg Stumbleupon Favorites More

 
Related Posts with Thumbnails